Week 4 Bad Zombie Movie Marathon Reviews

It’s week 4 of my zombie movie a day marathon with Gaynor Stenson on the Vamplit Blog and this was a bizarre week of different zombie movies. For the most part I enjoyed what I watched. Here are the reviews:

The only thing I knew about Johnny Sunshine going in was what I read in the Netflix description, which really leaves out much of what the film is really about. Here’s what I read: “In a world overrun by zombies, drugs and violence, entertainment is hard to come by. Enter Johnny Sunshine, the beautiful yet cold-blooded assassin whose zombie-killing exploits are the basis for the world’s most popular reality television show. When she discovers that her double-crossing producer has arranged to have her taken out, Johnny decides it’s time to take her world-famous murdering skills behind the scenes.” The film tried to shock the viewer from the very beginning and it delivered. A few minutes in I worried that’s all it would do, fortunately, there was a loose storyline I half way enjoyed. Johnny actually makes snuff films for her show. The only way she can get off is by torturing and killing her sexual partners. She also tortures and kills zombies on film. The film producer is a major producer of zombie/human porn movies and personifies greed in the world. When Johnny’s rating go down, he hires a bad cop to do to Johnny what she does to her victims. I actually enjoyed the movie because I could see this happening if our world were overrun with zombies. You really need to open your mind and at least halfway enjoy torture movies and horror porn to watch this one, which I do. For a low budget film, I think they did a pretty good job despite everyone else’s loathing of it, so I gave it 4 out of 5 bloody brains.

Return in Red was a strange one and I loved its storyline about “A small town’s population dwindles to dangerously low levels when the residents unknowingly become guinea pigs in an unethical science experiment designed to test the effect of electromagnetic frequencies on the human brain.” Unfortunately this is another film that has been bashed by viewers expecting all zombie films to be packed with action, blood and guts, which you don’t get a lot of until later in the film. There was very little dialog and a lot of background noise that worked well with the whole theme of the movie. It mesmerized me as I watched the townspeople who already live their day to day lives a bit like voodoo zombies. Add in the affects of the experiment and it delivered a pretty good psychological horror movie. Watch it closely and you’ll get drawn in by the moodiness and darkness of what is happening to the townspeople. Of all the movies I’ll watch this month, this will be one of the most memorable. I say kudos to the director and give it 4 out of 5 bloody brains.

Nightmare Alley is an extremely low budget Tales from the Crypt rip off that was okay. There was only one zombie short in the collection, which was also okay. According to the cover it won an award, although I couldn’t find any information about the contest on the IMDB page nor could I read the name of the contest. I can’t say much more about this collection and quickly forgot most of what I saw, so I give it barely 2 1/2 out of 5 bloody brains.

Wicked Little Things struck me as a typical Hollywood produced horror movie, set on drawing in crowds with the same old format, although the storyline was a little different. So it was all a bit predictable in regards to how it would end. I mean, look at the movie description. “When a grieving widow moves her two daughters to a rustic house in the Pennsylvania mountains, she hopes the solitude will help them work through feelings of abandonment. But they hardly have time to reflect, as they discover unexpected neighbors. As it turns out, the ghosts of children who were killed in a tragic accident more than 90 years before are still “playing” in the mine shaft nearby, and would love to have the neighborhood kids join them.” Pretty typical, huh? The dark atmosphere of the movie is what I enjoyed most, so I give it 3 out of 5 bloody brains.

I finally watched Stake Land last week and loved it. I had to sneak it in here because it felt like a zombie movie to me. Have we created a new creature lately, trying to keep horror movies fresh? Do these horrific creatures have a name, zompires or vambies? Please help me, people, because I haven’t been paying attention. I’m certainly not complaining because they created quite a horrific monster in Stake Land. I just wouldn’t call them vampires. Anyways, I have only one complaint about Stake Land, the script felt borrowed from too many other movies. Still, I loved the characters and atmosphere. I give it 4 out of 5 bloody brains.

I don’t understand why people hate Zombie Farm. It’s not that bad. The acting is pretty good, the characters are likeable and it has a decent voodoo zombie storyline. There are a few complaints about women being treated badly in this movie, but, um, there would be no storyline without it and it is horror. The movie isn’t the best zombie movie out there, but it held my attention and my sons. I was a little surprised it was made in 2009 because it felt like it could have been made sometime in the 1970s. For a low budget film, it rates pretty high in quality compared to other zombie films. This movie doesn’t stand out, but it is entertaining. Jake and I agreed it deserved 3 out of 5 bloody brains.

Zombies Zombies Zombies is about “an unorthodox drug experiment conducted by a mad scientist transforms the residents of a small town into flesh-eating zombies, a motley crew of exotic dancers, pimps, hookers and johns are forced to take refuge inside a seedy strip club.” I really couldn’t have explained it any better. This was a FUN FUN FUN film and BLOODY BLOODY BLOODY! Especially loved that they pitted the hookers and the strippers against each other, and the cat fights made it even more of a hoot to watch. You’ve gotta ignore the reviews and at least try watching this one. Pop some corn, turn it on and sit back and enjoy it. I loved it and give it 4 out of 5 bloody brains.

Heads up, next week’s movies include: Boy Eats Girl, Return of the Living Dead 3, Zombie High, Revenge of the Living Dead Girl, Doctor Blood’s Coffin, Survival of the Dead, Beneath the Surface

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